Can you see it? By Jon Walker... Too good not to share via my blog...

 

Can you see it?

Can you see it?

We look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are unseen.  The things which are seen are temporal and the things which are not seen are eternal. 1 Corinthians 4:18 (NIV)

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When life begins to squeeze us, what we truly believe is revealed through our attitudes and actions. And, if the truth be told, most of us live by sight more than by the hope and certainty of our faith.

With the patience of Job, Jesus tells us again and again that we have to look past the things we see into the eternal reality of the unseen (Where do you think Job got such Jesus-like patience?)

When people approached Jesus to tell him about their circumstances, he’d often say something like, “You’re looking for a drink of water, but look past your circumstances because I’m the living water. I can quench your thirst for eternity, not just in this moment. Can you see it?” Or, “You want to see bread right now, but I want you to see that I am the living bread. I can feed you for this one meal, but – Look! – I can feed you for all eternity. Can you see it?”

In one of those grand, mysterious paradoxes, Jesus is saying we should see the unseen – and the way to do that is to stay intimate with him and to let the Holy Spirit direct our sight, our physical eyes and our spiritual eyes.

When we believe that reality is confined to only what we see, we become trapped into thinking the only truth is what we see. We become prisoners to our perceptions; we cease to be freedom fighters walking in faith.

Time and time again we see Jesus moving the focus from the seen to the unseen. He knew that for those who walk by faith, appearances are never the ultimate reality.

Are there parts of your life that have you discouraged or depressed, that have you wondering where God is?  He’s tapping you on the shoulder, reminding you to look up beyond the horizon into eternity.

What does this mean?

• Reality extends beyond what you can see – God, Jesus, and heaven are reality, even if they are unseen for now. The things we see are temporary; the things we do not see are eternal. (1 Corinthians 4:18 NIV)

• God is at work – Even though things may appear bad on the surface, God is working it all out for good (Romans 8:28, Jeremiah 29:11). Jesus is the author, and he knows how the story ends. So, fix your eyes on the unseen, and not solely on what is seen. (2 Corinthians 4:18, NIV)

-end-

By Jon Walker

We look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are unseen.  The things which are seen are temporal and the things which are not seen are eternal. 1 Corinthians 4:18 (NIV)

When life begins to squeeze us, what we truly believe is revealed through our attitudes and actions. And, if the truth be told, most of us live by sight more than by the hope and certainty of our faith...

With the patience of Job, Jesus tells us again and again that we have to look past the things we see into the eternal reality of the unseen (Where do you think Job got such Jesus-like patience?)

To finish reading this devotion click ---->  HERE

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As I've mentioned on this blog before I subscribe to 3... well, actually 4 online devotions now.  I'm not quite in the daily habit of reading the 4th one quite yet, but I try my best to be faithful in reading my other 3 daily.  If I miss any, I go back to read and I've found playing catch up can be very beneficial as it helps me to focus and absorb better whatever the Lord wants me to glean from the devotionals.  Often, my "3" will almost overlap each other with the verses being shared, or the lessons.  They'll be *that* similar.  Oh boy!  Whenever, that happens I know God has something special for me... that He's speaking to me.  Everyone needs to hear from the Lord particularly during challenging times and situations, so I couldn't resist sharing Jon Walker's Grace Creates devotion for today here.  And, on FaceBook, I guess now... if the little integration app works!  ;)

Well, today I needed a special something, a gentle reminder.  He is speaking to me.  Not just for myself; for a few people I care about and know personally.  One really needs a miracle to happen where their business is concerned.  The person so needs multiple break throughs, but the most important need right now is for them to earn a living... FAST!  They've been working countless hours and have invested every thing they have.  They're brilliant, dedicated, strong and gifted.  They know God is in control, but is in need of prayer and favor.  God knows the person by name.  And thankfully, in spite of their circumstances they are in the palm of His hand.  Like me, there's a time that the holding pattern end must come to an end.  That person is about there.  So, any readers that compelled to pray and intercede, my thanks to you.

It's beautiful outside today.  I took a lovely glass mug of hot Chinese Silver Needles White tea outside a little while ago.  The air was so crisp and fresh.  And there's a sensational breeze.  Chance and Summer loved it.  They sniffed the air and caught sight of a few birds.  They were hoping the squirrels would come out of the trees so they could rush at them through the fencing.  They have recently become a tag team.  It's a new thing for Summer to be frisky, which is just fab!  However, the breeze flowing through the trees and the sounds of the neighborhood scared little Sydney.  She stayed stuck to me.

All I did was sit in my dad's cedar rocking chair and soak up the warm sun... sipped tea... ate part of warm muffin with peanut butter on it.  It was really melted and messy today... makes it more yummy!

Later this afternoon, the Springers and I will do the same, except it will be time to for me to share an apple with the girls.  Chance is not into fruit.  But, he'll get treated to a couple of cookies.

Have much to catch up on here...

Quick 'n and Out... Kind of an Update

My Twitter Profile Photo ------>


For those of you who may not know what Twitter is, a post or two down I shared I'd started "tweeting" for both Sydney & I. There are many reasons behind my choice to do such a thing, but this entry is simply to advise I've now added the Twitter Widget on the right hand column of my blog. Meaning... my live tweets will post live here as I tweet. So, when I'm not making blog entries, live info tweeted by me is still passing to my blog.

Hope this makes sense. If you have a Twitter Account it, will... if not... read the live feed and it'll help.

Still VERY much going on in my life and the lives of my family members & loved ones. Please keep us in your prayers. Me, I need strength & renewing every day as we all do, and God delivers up fun & interesting & powerful & inspiring & uniquely special ways to bless me with it. I've connected with others living with Epilepsy on both Face Book & Twitter, and some amazing people of God, too. Ministers, laymen... Christians and a few even have Epilepsy. Thank God for the net and the ability it gives people like me who are for the most part home bound, because without connections, I'd go nuts!

Words coming in via various ways on the net (from emails I receive from friends, family members, and even people I don't know but care, then add, my online devotions, & my praise music) I really don't know how I'd make it. Phone calls I do get, but these days... I'm really not into phoning nor calling. Aiming for peace, joy & focus constantly. My biggest prayer need of all is that I lose time each day... I need to make better use of it, although I'm trying hard. The not driving thing is getting to me now more than ever, yet, I enjoy the nature that surrounds my home. See beauty every where I look outside.

I'm holding fast... and hanging on tightly to overwhelming, overcoming, unspeakable joy. Spending much time interceding. Trying to build myself up physically and spiritually as well as help others as best I can. I know I've been redeemed... that God is ever faithful. But, I must say my upcoming visit to the Comprehensive Epilepsy Center @ Wake Forest Baptist Hospital with my new doctor can't come soon enough. I'm praying for favor and that she'll be open to start at the beginning. From my traumatic birth onwards... I've all the information that was missing from my past now except for one piece (which really doesn't matter) and found out I had yet another head blow when I was about four. My mother remembered it recently. That's four now. Not too long afterwards, was when my migraines started in first grade.

It's been an amazing journey rediscovering some of my blocked past as well as key information my mother hadn't really forgotten, but hadn't connected to the dots until she read the Newsweek article I continue to mention... Living in the Grips of the Unknown. You can find a link to it by clicking the label below or upper corner of the right panel side.

I do have some photos to share, yet still not in the groove to post yet. I have a couple stories to share, too. But, I am undecided as to whether I will or not yet. If it's right, I will. If not, I won't. However, soon I will post some updated photos of Sydney. Her first birthday is coming up toward the end of the month. She has GROWN!!!

Bye for now......

Getting the focus OFF of me for a few...

I have several almost completed blog entries, yet have been unable to post them for various reasons. I could write a list, but then my reasons would appear as excuses. Excuses they aren't, so you just gotta trust me.

Bottom line, right now there are an incredible amount of prayer needs coming my way... in my own family. In the families of people close to me. In my church family. In my community. In the families of acquaintances and people I don't even know... perhaps brush shoulders with on the internet. Yet, there are faces and/or profiles/bios/stories attached.

So, those of you who faithfully read... send notes and I connect via other avenues, please just take a moment to pray as God leads you to... it doesn't matter if your prayers are for anyone(s) I've mentioned above... just PRAY!!

Thank you from the bottom of my heart... I'll be making an entry soon. Just need confirmation of which direction to go into. My problem, I've way too many interests and only one me. Yet, the body of Christ on this earth is HUGE and it's growing daily!!

and again... I will be coming back to this entry to add a photo... of what yet, I do not know.

Pondering directions.........

It's 12:16 a.m. Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Had to re-write this from way early Monday a.m. Re-title it, too.

Words weren't flowing very well and my heart was touched so much at church it hurt. Although, indeed it was a very joyful service. Testimonies were given by visiting men from the ages of 18 to 50 who were once addicted to drugs and alcohol, or both. An alter call was given for those who had lost family members or people close to them who were bound by various things. So, I went to the front and hands were laid upon me. I don't go to alter calls often for several reasons, but just felt the call to go forth. This was the first time I've walked up and stood without having my husband come along. He stayed in his chair. I felt a little alone up there at first mainly because he usually comes to help steady me due to balance issues. But, the cool thing is that I was remarkably steady. My balance was okay. I took many photos during the service, too. Even felt compelled to trek to the car to get one of my cameras. Normally, I don't take one into church. There's another gentleman who takes photos. He really caught "the bug" to buy a new camera and start shooting after he saw some shots I took during a hike my husband I made to a nearby by railroad trestle last autumn. And, he does one terrific job, too! He has the fever, too!

The music was wonderful and the visiting speaker; his son, and their group of 20 men gave us more. Afterwards, when the visiting speaker gave the alter call and laid hands on me, he prayed for many who are close to me. He even asked me to call out their names individually. I did very quietly, but my memory gets sketchy sometimes, and I missed one. He also prayed for my healing to manifest. Believe me, I embraced it and tears flowed. Yet, it was later when I realized I'd forgotten that one very special person. Fortunately, I know God knows this person and many prayers are being lifted up. Not just by me, but by many. So, I didn't beat myself up over it.

There are those I'm concerned about -- that God is the only answer for. Those who are hurting. Fortunately, I do know Him and that Jesus is my savior. That the Holy Spirit is with me. I'm not worried about them -- it's more like a weight. And... a wait. But, I believe and am confident prayers all prayers that are being lifted up on their behalf will be answered. Miracles will happen. That they're in the works.

Now, about Project Rewire, for all intents and purposes I'm pondering whether it has served its purpose. If it's glorifying God. Even though, true healing has not been fully physically manifested yet, I still believe it is forthcoming. I've claimed it. I admit though that I need help to see myself healed -- the actual image of it. At times I allow the "E" condition in and of itself, along with the mood swings (some Rx driven), life circumstances, and being in limbo -- waiting for my June 9th appointment with my new neurologist/epileptologist, and pretty much being stuck at home -- not driving -- not contributing to our income all factor in and kinda hits me at times. When it does, it's overwhelming and I feel weak. Some days it's a little battle. While other days my humaness just gets me. Outside factors easily contribute to it. Yet, I know when I am weak He is strong. Perhaps being weak is a good thing? Yes?

So, what to do? Build my faith stronger. Confess His word. Fill my head with it. And, not stop listening to my praise music. Watch my words that come out of my mouth and my self-talk.

What is important for me to keep in mind, is that I do have many of my words back and am more creative in some different ways than I've ever been. That I've put everyone else in God's hands. Also, to be totally honest, at times I feel that Project Rewire in many regards has become a public journal, so it's time to re-evaluate.

What I do know for sure is that God is continually building my testimony, no doubt about it. At times, I do question as to whether I still have abilities and talents. Yet, the Word says... promises... He's given us unique talents and abilities... gifts, too among other things. So, I just need to check myself, rather than wonder if Project Rewire is all just about "me stuff". One thing that really struck me as I watched Joel Olsteen on television at Yankee Stadium live this past Saturday night... he said, "when you've done all you can, that's when God kicks in". Maybe I'm close to that place, because I've about done all I know to do. Maybe now, is "wait" time.

See... God expects us to do our part. It's a given. And, I'm trying my best, too. Where I may be tripping up is that I'm trying to do other people's parts, too. Something my wise big sister pointed out. Different word choices, similar meaning though. And, she indeed has much wisdom. So, as I write this... I'm going to let loose and turn them over to God. Admittedly, again. Yet, I'll do my best to be available to help if I can. Ever encourage and lift up. But, step out of the way, and let God do His work. Praying for divine connections and divine appointments for those people; for myself, too!

One word about my joyful sister, last year when i went into the Epilepsy Monitoring Unit at Wake Forest Baptist Hospital, we didn't know how many days I would be there wired up waiting to captures seizure events. 24/7 with wires stuck to my head the entire time on camera and sound the entire time -- we didn't know how long I'd be there. Well, she came to help. Stay with our mother. She originally came for what we thought at the most would be a couple of weeks. Well, she wound up staying for close to six weeks. There were things my husband and I needed help doing for our mother. And, I needed help. I walked out of that clinic pretty much in pieces because no events were captured. I'd pinned so many hopes on that stay and I hated it in there. Went sleep deprived for days longer that they even required. But, brains don't act on demand. They have their own minds. However, my eeg did clearly show that I was prone to seizures and it was an odd eeg to read. (It's suspected I'm experiencing deeper level seizure activity. It's just not been "captured" yet for a firm diagnosis to be made for medical intervention. Being aytpical... being unique has it's ups and downs, yet God is bigger. :)

From my sister's generous help and time, when she finally went back home to PA. I traveled along to give her company. Although I didn't drive. I helped with her Maltese pups. Once there, we did our usual fun stuff, but I helped a bit in her yard and with her laptop. And, it was on THAT trip where I found those pink Crocs -- the pink shoes God used to get my attention... which led me to pick up my camera and partner with Him to begin Project Rewire. My sister's reaching out to me... reaching out to help my mother, turned into a good thing. An inspiring chain of events took place. Yes, I did my part, and since it reinforced what I've known for decades now... when hurting sometimes the best most helpful thing one can do is to reach out to help another. Not saying my sister was hurting, but just giving my perspective from what was birthed from her helping me. If a person can't depend on their sister for help, who can a person turn to? I encourage anyone who is hurting reading this... reach out to help someone. There are times that person is in your own family. God will bless you for it.

Me personally, I know for sure God can heal me instantly, yet I've sensed since Project Rewire began that He is building my testimony as He journeys me to healing. So for a time, I need to focus on other things. Spend time in prayer, in His word the best ways I can get it into me and seek His counsel. He's the only one with the answers I need. And, I'm so overdosed on talking about myself... bringing attention to myself for my causes. Much easier said than done.

I also need to spend more time in concentrated prayer about those who are close to me and to my heart. There are several right now who need prayers answered more than me, and I'm really feeling the need to intercede more than ever. Maybe this is just another time of fasting from this place?

We shall see. For those who are believers you will understand, for those who aren't. God is real, I just need to know whether others see Him reflected in me somewhere. Believing and asking God to let me know that in a uniquely special way from someone who knows me and from someone who really doesn't.

Thanks to all who have faithfully read. You can still find me on FaceBook. Yet, I'm going to spend a some time away from there, too. Will check in and out for awhile. There's much to do here in my home. In my yard. My desk is piled up. And, I need to allow God to renew me.

God bless all. Will I be getting rid of this blog entirely? No way. I've invested too much time in it and captured too many memories to do such a thing. It would be like losing a part of my life. Every word has been written from my heart. I'm just not in a place where I can write another word about me at this moment. For now, there are other words I'm feeling led to write. As well, as commitments to keep.

And, yes... this is part of living with the "E" condition. The ups and downs of it. That much I'm sure of. It's part of being human, too. ;)

So, for now... please keep me in your prayers.........

If I receive confirmation that Project Rewire is a work God wants me continue to do, when I come back, I'll post photos of the church service mentioned above. Give the name of the group and their wonderful leader. Before I ever post photos of other people, I always want to make sure it's the right thing to do. Think about it and pray about it. It's not a permissions thing. In photography, the photographer owns the photos and as long as the photos aren't being used to "make money", photos can be posted or used for personal reasons. And, the photos are copyrighted. Yep, even on a public blog, but sensitivity and confidentiality is essential in dealing with hurting people and those in recovery. So, this is a place where I need to be extremely sensitive. Another good reason to take a break. Be quiet and listen to what God has to say to me. While, I clear up some clutter. In my house and in my brain. Edited in a blurb about photography.

***************************added Sunday evening, May 3, 2009, 11:07 p.m.***************************

If this is the first time you've ever read my blog... the recent Newsweek article, is the best resource I've ever come across to give my readers an idea of what "it's" like for me. I'm all over the article, as well as in the stories shared. About this same time last year, I had the same hair do for almost 7 days.

In the Grip of the Unknown

As a gal on a mission, I intend to reference this article from time to time. It's also in my right side panel column of meaningful links. A cure needs to be found regardless of my personal situation. I've much to share about the lack of attention to the need for a cure in future entries.

Heavy Metal, strength & power -- reappearance of my Pink Crocs!

One of my friends and blog readers kind of joked with me about my adoration of heavy metal last week. No, no, no!

Not of heavy metal music, but rather, my love for trains, rails and tracks! So, late last Saturday afternoon I asked my husband to take me down to the Hamlet Historical Depot Museum/Hamlet Crossing to shoot some of the piles of rails they have there and piles of metal parts and pieces. My friend had inspired me, with just two little words used in a totally different context than one would normally suggest they be used. But, I got it! Those two words were all I needed to hear. They gave me energy and a focus I didn't think I could muster.

I'd been dragging all day -- resisting a cold for several days and trying to save my resources for church the next Sunday. We'd already missed three Sundays in a row. Yes, Easter, too. We were not about to miss another. Plus, we had plans to attend a special event out of town directly afterwards. In Red Springs, NC about an hour away. Also, admittedly even though, I've no fear, absorbing the Newsweek article was a great deal to take in. It stung a little. Me, with my atypicalness and number of seizures I've experienced over my life. Well, the stats aren't in my favor. Fortunately, God is bigger than those stats. But, the human in me would surely love to just sit with Dr. Devinsky for a few minutes. Because he understands in a way even other neurologists can't.

With me these days, I truly have to take it a day at a time. If I do a bunch of stuff one day, the next day lately it can become a harder challenge to push myself. Anyway, I sorely needed something to get me moving. Something extra to motivate me. My friend's mention of heavy metal did it! I'd already lost what I thought was the better part of the day.

As we arrived at the HHD/H-Crossing we spent some time talking to a couple of wonderful trainmen volunteers working inside the museum we've gotten to know. I'd taken my old laptop in to show them a few stills I'd taken of the volunteers and also of what will soon become our new hobby... rail car aka motor car riding. They enjoyed the photos. Then, when it was closing time for the museum we went outside to watch for trains.

As I looked around all of the property there, even though the train traffic did get my attention, I was fixated on the oxidizing piles of rails and metal parts and pieces. They kept calling to me. Personally, I find the rusting made the piles, parts and pieces, extremely interesting. I like red rust. On the heavy metal -- it adds character. And, it makes for a nice contrast.

Just about everything outside these days I see, I see as art. No matter where my eyes take me. I view things so differently than I did before Project Rewire. I've always been keenly observant, but now it's taken on a whole new dimension, in a way. It's another one of those I see beauty in the imperfections things, too.

Many of you may look at the slide show below and wonder what in the world is going on in Jeanne's head. Trust me, I'd sure like to know, too! All I know is when I pick up my camera, I can block everything else out. All of the neuro activity I'm usually filtering out by myself, sort of stops for a few. Sometimes I choose to sit on the ground in curious positions out of curiosity... even laying flat, on all fours, or leaning at weird angles, just to snap a shot from a different perspective. It helps me see the world and all the details around me from an interesting point of view. Not from an ordinary view. I'm looking for the extraordinary everywhere I go. Everywhere my eyes take me, these days I look intently. I could go on and on, but this will be 20 pages if I do! So, I'm going to try to keep my rambling on track. ;)

Then, today in processing the photos, all of the heavy metal shots reminded me of God's strength. The large heavy duty rails. The metal parts and pieces. All so very heavy and strong. The last photo of the little power box helped me to recall the power God has given we humans to use here on earth. Although it's a little power box, it amazing the electricity that can flow through such a little box. And, that little power box is solidly attached to a brick wall. Made up of a bunch of bricks offset to make it stronger!

I could side track like crazy on bricks and walls, saving for another trek in some direction. And, metaphorically, I could elaborate about the things I believe God is showing me regarding power and strength. But, today is not a day when my words are flowing easily, so I have to be careful, not to frustrate myself.

In a few of the shots you'll see that the sky is lost. I could have added special effects to paint the sky back in, but who am I to paint the sky back in? I saw the blue and remember it. I enjoyed watching the poofy clouds pass by. Even though neither show up well, It doesn't mean they are not there. Just like God and the promises and gifts He's given us to use on earth. His power, strength and authority. I don't see Him, yet I know He is there for me and for all of you. I don't feel Him, yet I have the faith that He is. As well as I know the tools He's given us to use.

In viewing my photos you'll see that the sun was so bright reflecting off of the heavy metal in several shots. Maybe too brightly in some shots, but see... my mind was fixated on the metal. In several shots I wasn't even holding the camera. I had it setting by itself on another piece of metal somewhere. I wanted to see what the camera saw without my directing it. I had to straighten those shots a little, but also had to make sure not to go too far, or I'd totally skew the photo. I used a few other minimal effects this time on the majority of the photos. So, I tweaked to sharpen a bit, as well as added a touch of shadowing here and there. And, a little fill light on a few where needed. Purposely, I didn't use any filtering effects. I'm still into no edits (as much as possible) and effects only when truly needed. Not to perfect.

So, the better part of the day, actually turned out to be the end of the day. My fave shots are of the metal boxes. My husband likes the close ups of the end of the rail shots, and my friend likes shot 10 and shot 25.

Notice the reappearance of my pink Crocs!!! So glad it is spring and I can wear them again. My signature shoes! After I got motivated, I decided it was time to pull them out and remember the reason for starting Project Rewire. Who knows where those pink Crocs will take me, but one thing I do know, God knows. He'll direct my path.

I do, however, ask for prayer from those of you that pray. However, you feel led.

Thank you, tons.